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- Sun Aug 05, 2007 9:21 pm
Hi, I'm 19 years old (20 next month). I've never been to a gynecologist before, but will start soon since I plan on having sex in the near future. I'm not currently on any medications. I rarely ever am; typically when I am it's for my allergies. I've never had any surgeries other than getting my wisdom teeth out.
Now that the introductions are over, on to the question. :p
I always hear everyone talk about how sensitive the clitoris is, to the point of pain if it's touched directly. This is not the case with me. My clitoris isn't sensitive at all when I'm not aroused, and when I am aroused, it's still not very sensitive. It never really has been, but it's less so now. I rarely ever touch the clitoris directly; when I masturbate I stimulate it through the hood. I was just wondering what would cause my clitoris to lack sensitivity, and if there's anything I can do about it. I feel like I'm missing out on a wonderful sex life. My orgasms aren't ever that great, and I feel that the lack of sensitivity in my clitoris is largely to blame. Also, I'm worried that this will also be true when I do start having sex, and it'll be just as much of a let down as my masturbation sessions are.
Any help anyone can give me would be greatly appreciated.
| Debbie Miller, RN
- Mon Aug 06, 2007 8:48 pm
I think the main thing that may make a difference is the psychological/emotional element that is lacking with strictly physical sex activity. Arousal in a loving relationship plays a huge role in satisfaction, pleasure and enjoyment of intimate physical sharing.
Once you are in a committed and loving relationship where feelings are considered and respect is paramount, you may find yourself very aroused and your body will likely respond appropriately. But, like many other things, it takes time, patience and practice. Sometimes sexual intercourse in and of itself is over-rated. Blame some of it on the media which suggests that every sexual encounter consists of rocket-blasting mutual orgasm resulting from intercourse alone. Don't underestimate the effects of emotions and the quality of the relationship. I would not be too quick to worry about your sex life based on your masturbating experiences or even during the first years. It can take a while to develop this kind of maturity in the physical part of your life. Many women report that their best sexual years are in their 30s and 40s.